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Bodybuilding isn’t known for its tender moments.

Like any sport performed at the upper echelons of competition, professional bodybuilding requires 24/7 dedication, torturous training regimens, years-long commitment, and a pain tolerance psychologists would call psychotic or super-human.

Standing at the finish line of every bodybuilding competition is a row of gigantic men, tanned and oiled and posing for the judges. But the lead-up to the flashing cameras and roaring crowds is not so pretty.

Everybody has been to a gym. Few have seen the level of self-mutilation that occurs at a gym full of professional athletes training for their livelihood.

Which is why the 1977 documentary “Pumping Iron” had such a huge impact on the sport (not to mention Arnold Schwarzenegger’s career). …


Decoders Cash In On Funnier Phrases Found During Early Attempts to Crack the 50-Year Mystery

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TO EAGLE AND MOUS THE FIRSELLED THINK

One of the Zodiac Killer’s famous ciphers has finally been cracked. Unfortunately for the code crackers — and the population at large — the cipher turned out to be useless, and so the San Francisco-area serial killer, who took at least five lives in the 1960s and ’70s, remains at large.

While solving the cipher was no small feat, the pot at the end of the proverbial rainbow ended up being full of scribbled pages torn from a teenager’s diary.

The cracked code revealed nothing of the killer’s identity, whereabouts, motive, or information about victims. So banal was the discovery that the two print newspapers left in America red-lined the story to a two-paragraph brief on page nine. …


Where the Masculinity Movement Breaks Down (In Tears)

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Image by PublicDomainPictures

I’m all for male empowerment. In a society that minimizes the good qualities of masculinity and demonizes the rest, more and more men seem to exist without a connection to the skills and instincts that make them who they are.

Labeling everything that isn’t tender “toxic” and everything that isn’t feminism “patriarchal” isn’t doing men or women any good.

But there’s a sub-sect of the #MasculinityMovement that’s counterproductive to the goal of helping men. It’s what I call the Sissification Doctrine.

The barometer for any idea — new or old, Left or Right, male or female — should be utility. I’m open to anything that’s useful, but Sissification doesn’t actually work, and it doesn’t work for the simple reason that you can’t convince men it’s okay to be pussies any more than you can pray for a Ferrari to appear in your garage. …


MUSINGS

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“All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players.” — Shakespeare

This is one of those lines that comes to me sometimes — not in the moment of conflict or frustration, but later, after the fact; post-hoc solace.

When one considers that most people are operating on 95% default responses to outside stimuli, it makes a pretty powerful case for God and Creation, though why He would make so many assholes is beyond me (God’s reason is beyond Man’s).

The quote frames the world in a rather comical light, this idea that we are all actors rehearsing pre-written lines, dancing puppets on strings, operating based on whatever poorly wired machinery is inside us. …


A Tiny Snowman Tale

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Not everything is a life-changing revelation, but there is meaning in the little things. It’s pretty easy to forget that the foundation of a man is not the single slab, but the accumulation of individual stones. (You can’t see the forest for the trees, as the saying goes.)

Some things in life happen to you, some things you cannot choose. But how fascinating is it to realize not only that you can choose, but to realize that you can choose from any stone in the riverbed, from any river in the world?

When you pay attention, you can find meaning in everything. …


Sciences Shows Being Lonely Makes You A Dick

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Inverse Correlation is Causation

Everybody needs a sounding board. Stuff bothers us, and we need someone who loves us to talk out our problems with, to just listen and nod and sympathize, or to tell us when to chill the fuck out.

It’s no different than driving —men drive slower, less aggressively, with greater middle finger restraint when their woman is in the car — only the steering wheel is a keyboard and the highway is the World Wide Web.

The jury is in on the benefits of marriage. …


If the Event of An Apocalypse, Rate Your Confidence Level

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Looking around, I feel alright, comparatively speaking.

I’m grateful. I have a house, two freezers in the garage, a solid truck, a bug-out bag ready to go, two propane tanks, and a family-sized tent. We have money in the bank and rifles and ammo to hunt. I work out, I box, I go to the shooting range now and then. Compared to most people I know, if shit hits the fan we’re fucking golden.

In fact, we just watched The Omega Man (1971) and I’m feeling pretty confident.

While I couldn’t draw my own blood without looking like I’d been abused by a drunk acupuncturist (let alone create a vaccine to cure zombiism), I’m pretty sure I could drive around gathering supplies from empty stores in the daylight. …


In the Absence of Consensus, America Awaits the Leviathan’s Rules of Engagement

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Photo by Adam Wilson

In a near-unified front, Big Tech and social media are wiping political voices from their platforms, citing rule violations for “inciting violence” that were opponents argue were not equally applied to those encouraging, promoting, and justifying the mayhem of the 2020 Summer of Floyd protests.

Following the Congressional certification of electors and the storming of the U.S. Capitol, nearly every social media platform has taken some action against President Donald Trump and/or his allies, from deleting personal accounts and YouTube channels to removing apps for download.

Whether you support or abhor these actions is irrelevant. As in the case of the protests, advocates of each side will cite and recite data and talking points that conform to their position, and neither side bothers anymore to engage audiences outside of their own echo chamber. …


Breakthrough Research Settles Long-argued Idiom, ‘If A Frog Had Wings It Wouldn’t Bump Its Ass When It Hops’

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Frog-bird Researchers Researching their frog-bird discovery

Scientists from the University of Minnesota, working off a $450 million grant from the National Science-ish Foundation, recently published a study revealing that if frogs had wings they would in fact be birds.

“It’s a real honor to be a part of this discovery,” research leader Bradley Meeker said in a video posted to his YouTube channel, Meeker’s Beakers. “In applying hard science to real-world questions, we have succeeded where so many have failed.”

The revelation follows two years of strenuous research and arduous field work. The team of eight doctoral students, most of whom are lifetime students, spent countless hours at the library, reading books, writing things, and sitting at the pond behind the university, observing frogs. …


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Martin Riggs is…Buddy Cop Jesus

Every year, as part of our American family tradition, we sit down to binge-watch the great Christmas movies of our time: Home Alone, The Santa Clause, Home Alone 2, The Santa Clause 2. Then the grand finales: Die Hard and the under-appreciated Lethal Weapon.

These movies are all franchises, because the originals are timeless. But what you realize when you’ve memorized the screenplay and watched the movie 36 times is that Lethal Weapon wasn’t meant to be a franchise. …

About

Nicholas Wilbur

Fitness | Fatherhood | Philosophy | Advocate of Working Hard & Working Out | Strive, Don’t Just Survive

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